Anal Stimulation and Intercourse

The topic of anal stimulation and intercourse arouses curiosity in some due to the mysterious and taboo nature of an anal sexual experience. Others view anal stimulation and intercourse as a way to spice up their sex life.  Exploring anal sex can offer a different kind of pleasure. And for some, anal play is forbidden.  Only you can determine whether or not anal sex is right for you.  Having accurate information is important in helping you make the best decision and in preventing pain and injury as a result of your sexual expression.  As with any sexual activity, it’s important to have your partners consent before initiating anal stimulation or penetration. 

Anatomy

It is important to recognize that an anus is very different from a vagina.  Generally anal stimulation and intercourse affects the lower few inches of your colon, which includes the anus and rectum.  One very important difference between the anus and rectum is that the anus has nerve endings which are capable of experiencing pain while the rectum does not.  The sphincters or muscles that control bowel movements are located in the anus and lower rectum.  These muscles are divided into the internal and external sphincter.  The internal sphincter, which is adjacent to the colon wall, is an involuntary muscle that relaxes for a bowel movement to pass through.  When you are far from a bathroom you depend on your external sphincter, a voluntary muscle that you can contract to prevent an embarrassing occurrence.  While the internal sphincter relaxes when feces enter your rectum, it involuntarily contracts as a penis or other object attempts to enter from the outside.  The relaxation and contraction of the internal sphincter allows you to pass large stools relatively painlessly. However, an inserted penis or sex toy of equal or smaller size may hurt because during initial insertion the object is pushing against the contracted internal sphincter.  Once the internal sphincter relaxes, the experience can be more pleasurable.

Hygiene

While it is very important to make sure the anus is relatively clean, it’s also important to understand that an anus is an anus.  It can’t be treated as a vagina.  Instead of heavy and persistent wiping with toilet tissue, try gently wiping away fecal residue from the outer skin with a moist tissue, wet cotton balls or Tucks^® pads.  Avoid using baby wipes and other products that contain perfumes and dyes which can cause irritation.  If you are concerned about feces that may remain in your colon after a bowel movement or if you cannot make a bowel movement prior to anal intercourse, do not use an enema or douche.  Instead gently flush the area with a slender, tapered ear syringe.  Fill the ear syringe with warm water and lubricate the tip.  Insert into your anus and gently squeeze the bulb a few times.  This uses much less water than an enema or douche and you’re much more likely to fully release the water and feces.

Avoiding Pain, Injury, Incontinence and Infection

Allow for foreplay.  Foreplay can help you start to relax.  Also, include safer-sex practices in your foreplay.  Be sure to use a latex or polyurethane condom.  Anal intercourse is among the riskiest sexual activities probably due to the fact that the rectal mucosal lining is very thin and can easily tear during anal sex.  The mucosal lining absorbs water from the liquid waste of the small intestines and turns it into solid feces.  The absorptive properties of the mucosal lining make it a prime entryway for infections, including HIV.

Unroll a condom on your partner.  Using a water or silicone based lubricant, lubricate the condom and the outer anal area.  Do not insert your fingers into the anus.  Fingernails can sometimes cause more damage than a well-lubricated condom-covered penis. If the condom-covered penis is sufficiently lubricated, you will not need to use your fingers to lubricate the inside of your anus. It is also recommended that anal sex be initiated with the receptive partner on top.  When on top, the receptive partner can control how quickly and deeply the penis is inserted based on the contraction and relaxation of the internal sphincter muscle.  Lower yourself over your partner to the point where you feel discomfort.  Remember, as the penis enters the anus, the internal sphincter contracts.  Stay in this position, allowing your partner’s penis to apply a constant, gentle pressure on your internal sphincter.  Generally, within 30 seconds to one minute the internal sphincter will tire and relax involuntarily.  When you feel the sphincter relax you can further lower yourself onto your partner’s penis.  After a couple of up and down movements your internal sphincter muscle will be sufficiently stretched and you can try other positions.

When a penis or object initially enters the rectum, it pushes against the internal sphincter, which contracts immediately.  During the initial insertion, it is very important that the “bottom” or receptive partner have full control.  If inserted too deeply, too quickly, the penis or object can cause pain or even push through the closed sphincter causing an anal tear.  Although the threat of fecal incontinence from anal sex is small, it can occur from repeated injury to the internal sphincter.  This occurs when a penis is repeatedly inserted through a contracted internal sphincter.  Over time the muscle may be unable to properly seal tightly, resulting in fecal incontinence.  Rates increase with fisting and insertion of large sex toys into the anus.

Additional Tips

Anal stimulation and intercourse can be pleasurable for both partners if you follow a few simple rules:

• If it hurts, don’t do it. 
• Listen to your partners and respect their wishes. 
• If you start to experience pain or notice blood, stop immediately. 
• Always use safer-sex devices such as condoms, gloves or finger-cots.  Finger-cots are devices resembling male condoms, typically used to cover cuts and open wounds on fingers.  They are usually found in the wound care and bandage section of the drug store.
• Use a new latex condom with each sexual act if alternating between anal and vaginal sex.
• Do not pass sex toys back and forth between partners. 
• Avoid fisting and inserting very large sex toys into the anus.
• If complications arise, visit an understanding healthcare provider.

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Now, I am not a college person. Maybe some of you can help me out here - is this normal???????????